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Post by Skittles on Apr 11, 2005 18:41:43 GMT -5
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Post by Skittles on Apr 11, 2005 18:42:53 GMT -5
You Know You're Obssessed With BtVS When... - You whittle wooden stakes. - You kick doors open. - You carry around a stake, just in case. - You take long walks in the cemetery at night. - You have a strange fear of hospitals. - You don't complain about going to church anymore because you remember that your supply of Holy Water is running kind of low. - You wear crosses every day and have a vast selection of them. - You never verbally invite anyone into your home. - You keep all your important information on yellow disks. - You avoid fraternity parties. - As a rule you don't like to be surprised. - Your friends are fearful that if they call during "Buffy Hour" they'll be in for a long lecture the next day. - You bookmark the Coroner's Office as a favorite place. - When you hear that there's a new librarian at your school, you slam open the doors of the library and yell; "Okay. What's the sitch?". - You can recite a whole Buffy episode(s). - You wallpaper your room with pictures of the Buffy cast and complain when there isn't enough space to put them all up. - You ask a priest to bless your bottle of Perrier. - Just for the hell of it, you enter Moloch into several search engines. - You name your doll Miss Edith. - You let your bird die of starvation. - You paint your nails like Drusilla. - When your brother comes back from the zoo, you won't let him in the house. - The only way you know how to say the word bitch is 'bitca'. - You get your hair cut like Buffy's and your hairdresser keeps remarking that the picture you show her (for your haircut) looks oddly familiar. - You find yourself writing "You Know You've Seen Too Much Buffy When...". - Whenever you quote Buffy Verse, you laugh hysterically while your friends stare at you like you've grown another ear. - You always protest that Buffy is NOT a ditz's name. - When watching a new Buffy episode, people gawk at you when you manage to say the actor's lines right before they do. - You can't think of a thing to talk about with people who have never watched a Buffy episode. - You spend hours on the net looking for new Buffy pictures. - You get really really excited whenever you do find any new pictures. - You sit on a grave twirling a yo-yo and say: "Come on, rise and shine. Some of us have a ton of trig homework waiting at home." - You look for padlocked sewer access systems in mausoleums. - You decide to be Buffy for Halloween but your friends don't notice a change. - You own everything possible with the words Buffy the Vampire Slayer on them. - You get wigged out by mimes and dummies. - You have a chest in your room with a fake bottom that contains garlic, stakes, holy water and crosses. - You wig out whenever you have a substitute biology teacher. - You never go out with your boyfriend on the night of the full moon. - You avoid supposedly empty warehouses. - You have a fear of railroad spikes. - You punish your dolls. - You get a wheelchair just so that you can be called "Roller Boy". - You never have sex with your boyfriend for fear of what might happen to him. - You take up tae kwon do, kick boxing, street fighting and gymnastics and have a natural flair for all of them. - You eye your librarian to see if they're trying to tell you that you're the next Slayer. - You sleep with a stake under your pillow. - You sneak out of your bedroom window at night and hang out at the park because you've heard that several people have died there lately of exsanguination. - You're horrified of people who have never even heard of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. - You want to kill those that dis the show. - You dream of past Slayers. - Whenever you have a dream and you see your friend in it you run up to them the next day and begin to choke them as you ask:"What do you know?". - You never sign in someone's yearbook "Have a great summer!". - You don't like to use the word Master. - You write Buffy FanFic. - You date men whom you meet in dark alleys. - You bring a fire extinguisher to cheerleading tryouts. - You get nominated at school as "Person Most Likely To Be The Next Buffy the Vampire Slayer". - You buy knee-high boots. - You get two holes pierced in your left ear and three in your right, just to be like SMG.
CONTINUED...
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Post by Skittles on Apr 11, 2005 18:43:14 GMT -5
- You're on a first name basis with all the actores of BtVS except that you've never met them. -Though they used to appreciate your interest, the actors on BtVs are now scared to death of you. -You check people's lockers to make sure they don't have any books such as 'Gray's Anatomy' and 'Mortician Desk Reference. -You read a Buffy transcript at least once a day. - You befriend a computer genius and her friend. - You file complaints that the substitute biology teacher is harassing you. - When asked what your hobbies are you answer; "Slay...slay...slave to the television". - As far as you are concerned, Buffy and friends are actual people. - You drive to California to look for Sunnydale, you dial operator and ask him where it is, operator says there is no such place and you yell back at him that he's probably in league with some demons to keep you out of Sunnydale. - You enroll at Torrance High School. - All the actors on the show are shown a picture of you and are told to stay away at all costs. - When asked what you'll do when you're older you answer either dead or it's already been 'sealed in fate'. - You tape all Buffy episodes. - You buy all the CDs of songs that have ever been on Buffy. - You've been to all 1000 or so Buffy sites on the net. - You legally change your name to Buffy Summers or another character from the show. - You practically have a nervous breakdown when rerun season in on. - You cannot remember what you did with your life before Buffy. - Your motto is 'Life is short' or 'Seize the day'. - You never bring your date to the morgue. - You never buy your Halloween costume at a new costume shop called Ethan's. - You always beat up a snitch. - You nail crucifixes to your wall. - You make sure your parents never come to Parent-Teacher night at school. - You watch, laugh and mock talent shows. - When given an egg for parenting in Sex Ed. class you smash it with something heavy. - You're frightened of cheerleader wannabes. - You avoid saunas, who knows what they put in the steam? - You don't let people with long fingernails get too close to your throat. - You use a Thesulan Orb as a paperweight. - Whenever there's a Sadie Hawkins dance at school you lock yourself in your room. - You refuse to buy any candy being sold by the band at school. - You're sure that the government is up to no good. - You're afraid that the first Slayer will show up in your dreams and try to kill you. - You hate the idea of going to college and getting a roommate you don't know; she might be a demon! - You stop drinking beer because you're afraid that you'll turn into a caveman. - Whenever you get a cramp/"pang" you think that angel may be lurking around. - You attack anyone named Ethan. - You pursue witchcraft. - You cast spells that have been on BtVS. - You spend countless dollars on BtVS merchandise. - Everything pre-Buffy is now knowsn as BB; Before Buffy. - You buy BtVS VHS videos even though you already taped the episodes off TV. - You try to enroll at UC Sunnydale and are chocked to find that it doesn't exist. - You start dancing like Faith. - You have a dislike for the military and aren't surprised when they screw stuff up. - You buy realistic-looking false fangs and pop them in at night. - You refuse to schedule anything on a Tuesday night. - Life without BtVS appears to be meaningless. - You request the song 'Wild Horses' by The Sundays at your Prom. - You arm yourself with weapons on Graduation Day; you can never be too sure the Mayor won't turn into a demon. - You're afarid that the Chumash Indians will destroy your Thanksgiving supper. - You always get an uneasy feeling on Halloween. - You think that anyone that listens to Cher or Celine Dion is a demon. - You start a dance club and call it The Bronze. - You help new students (especially if they come from LA) with their books on the first day of school. (Ana) - Just in case you lose your voice you sleep with a message board under your pillow. (Ana) - You spy on your teachers to find out whether they lead a double life. (Ana) - Every time you see a soldier you have the tendency to hide in a corner. (Ana) - You notice that the number of friends you have drastically decreases around your birthday. (Jody) - You start thinking that you're dating an ex-wish demon who occasionally wants to eviscerate you. (Jody) - You discuss the events of the show with your friends as if they happened in reallife. (Ann) - Whenever someone annoys you, you say, "What's your deal?!" (Ann) - After high school you are seriously thinking about living in your basement, with your neato disco ball. (Ann) - You can't help but think that all the rodents your come in contact with are really Amy in disguise. (Ann) - You plan a trip to London, to find out where the Watcher's Council is located. (Ann) - After your junior year you leave for the summer, determined to live on the streets. Afterall, if Buffy did why can't you? (Ann) - You name your group of friends the Scooby Gang and assign characters to them from Scooby Doo based on their personalities. (Ann) - On a quiz on European countries you ace all the questions pertaining toe England and Ireland. (Ann) - You declare your school motto is "something weird is going on". (Ann) - You firmly believe that one day you will meet all the cast. (Ann) - You think that Joss Whedon took more than the character Xander form his past, and he in fact, knows the real Slayer. (Ann) - You schedule your life around Buffy. (Ann) - You're scared of finding dead bodies in dumpsters. (Ann) - You make scrapbooks devoted to the actors on Buffy. (Ann) - Your favorite day is Tuesday. (Ann) - You think your life is too normal, wishing for the life of the Slayer. (Ann) - On Valentine's Day you stay at home with your mother, pigging out and renting a bunch of chick flicks. (Ann) - You have written to all the stars and are expecting a reponse any day now. (Ann) - You're afraid a guy with cheese will haunt you in your dreams. (Mark) - You audition for the part of cowboy guy in Death of a Salesman. (Mark) - Whenever someone walks into the room you say, "Check out the lust bunny." (Mark) - You refuse to smoke in the school basement alone. (Matt) - You go to the prom with a duffel of "just-in-case" supplies and your black leathert jacket. (Matt) - It's never a problem chaning for patrolling - you've aptrolled many a time in halters. (Matt) - You buy a yellow mug that says "Kiss the Librarian" and use it only for Cherry Kool-Aid. (Matt) - You fear dreams of small baseball players. (Matt) - You fear the lunch lady's food. (Irene) - You position all the posters in your room so that the lovers are facing each other. (Mia) - You start writing "Don't walk away from me bitch!" on the chalkboards at school. (Jody) - You go shopping for furniture and ask to see "the sofa from hell". (Jody) - You stop believing in leprechauns and coincidences. (Jody) - Anyone that has the name Rupert or Giles is immediately assumed by you to be your Watcher. (Irene) - You have a soft spot for British people, though not if they've got platinum blond hair. - You always come back from summer vacation with a new hairdo (a la Buffy). - You fall in love with a college guy and stick by them when you find out they have a secret life. (ozdude) - You find out that BtVS: Season 1 will be released on DVD and rush out to buy a DVD player. (SydKid) - You walk down the street at night and see a dark figure wearing a long black coat, you scream "Angel!" (Carey) - You set off for college/high school every day wishing you could have your librarian waiting for you with news on the hellmouth. (Carey) - You wonder why guys you know don't look as good at 244 years old as Angel does. (Carey) - You collect the VHS box sets even thoughy ou already have the episode on tape. (Carey) - You buy a black and white kitty and name her Ms. Kitty Fantastico and called her Ms. Kitty for short. (Faith) - When you perform a part in your school play, you run off the stage, a la Willow. (Jade) - You sing the song Cordelia sang for your talent show. (Jade) - You buy two copies of every buffy video released and keep one in mint condition. (Jade) - You cut class, and leave through the window. (Jade) - You are wary of anyone named Sunday. (Jade) - You write Buffy Summers -- Class Protector on your umbrella. (Jade) - Whenever you see a rat, you immediately try to turn it back into Amy. (Jade) - You keep your mom away from your graduation and start a petition to keep the mayor away as well. (Jade) - You carry a knife like Faith's. (Jade) - You get your school band to perform the Buffy theme song. (Jade) - You purposefully get Buffy's exact SAT score. (Jade) - You think Sunnyvale, CA is really Sunnydale bu they changed the name to keep obsessed fans out. (Jade) - Whenever someone leaves the house, you say to them, "Be back before dawn." (Jade)
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Post by Skittles on Apr 11, 2005 18:55:14 GMT -5
Things I've done...
- Your friends are fearful that if they call during "Buffy Hour" they'll be in for a long lecture the next day. - You can recite a whole Buffy episode(s). - You wallpaper your room with pictures of the Buffy cast and complain when there isn't enough space to put them all up. - Just for the hell of it, you enter Moloch into several search engines. - You paint your nails like Drusilla. - The only way you know how to say the word bitch is 'bitca'. - You get your hair cut like Buffy's and your hairdresser keeps remarking that the picture you show her (for your haircut) looks oddly familiar. - Whenever you quote Buffy Verse, you laugh hysterically while your friends stare at you like you've grown another ear. - You can't think of a thing to talk about with people who have never watched a Buffy episode. - You spend hours on the net looking for new Buffy pictures. - You get really really excited whenever you do find any new pictures. - You get wigged out by mimes and dummies. - You're horrified of people who have never even heard of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. - You want to kill those that dis the show. - You write Buffy FanFic. - You're on a first name basis with all the actores of BtVS except that you've never met them. - Though they used to appreciate your interest, the actors on BtVs are now scared to death of you. ((They probly would be!!!)) - You read a Buffy transcript at least once a day. - As far as you are concerned, Buffy and friends are actual people. - You tape all Buffy episodes. - You've been to all 1000 or so Buffy sites on the net. - You cannot remember what you did with your life before Buffy. - Your motto is 'Life is short' or 'Seize the day'. - You're sure that the government is up to no good. - You spend countless dollars on BtVS merchandise. - Everything pre-Buffy is now knowsn as BB; Before Buffy. - You have a dislike for the military and aren't surprised when they screw stuff up. - Life without BtVS appears to be meaningless. - You start a dance club and call it The Bronze. ((We did get this new club around here called The Pulse, but I don't call it the Bronze to my friends. They just wouldn't get it.)) - You discuss the events of the show with your friends as if they happened in reallife. - Whenever someone annoys you, you say, "What's your deal?!" - You name your group of friends the Scooby Gang and assign characters to them from Scooby Doo based on their personalities. ((That's us!!!!!)) - You firmly believe that one day you will meet all the cast. - You schedule your life around Buffy. - You think your life is too normal, wishing for the life of the Slayer. - You're afraid a guy with cheese will haunt you in your dreams. - You buy a black and white kitty and name her Ms. Kitty Fantastico and called her Ms. Kitty for short. ((No, but I did start calling my black & white cat Miss Kitty Fantastico)) - You think Sunnyvale, CA is really Sunnydale bu they changed the name to keep obsessed fans out.
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Post by BuffyAnne5763 on Apr 11, 2005 22:37:33 GMT -5
I have a few to add to the existing list, but I left my "Buffy Bible" (my archive of essays and fanfic I've collected over the years) at my mom's. Whenever I get it back, I'll let you know, and also post The Joy of Spike
You'll love it...
B
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Post by Skittles on Apr 11, 2005 23:11:56 GMT -5
Alrighty. When I first read that list, I was laughing so much. It's hilarious. ;D
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